


The Vampire from Alcatraz: King of Vampires

by Chianine



Category: The Disaster Artist: My Life Inside The Room - Greg Sestero & Tom Bissell, The Room (2003)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-18
Updated: 2016-12-18
Packaged: 2018-09-09 11:33:01
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,459
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8889184
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Chianine/pseuds/Chianine
Summary: It's just possible side plot. Maybe Johnny is vampire.





	

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Truth](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Truth/gifts).



> _“As we drove down Sunset Boulevard, Tommy described to me the vampire movie he wanted to make. It had, I must admit, a killer title:_ The Vampire from Alcatraz: King of Vampires.”
> 
>  
> 
> _“'I want my car,' Tommy began, 'to fly off the roof and into the sky.'_
> 
> _By now Raphael was prepared for literally anything when Tommy began discussing his ideas. Even so, I could tell this particular vision had really, deeply stunned him._
> 
> _'Why,' Raphael said, 'do you want to do this, exactly?'_
> 
> _'It's just possible side plot. Maybe Johnny is vampire.'”_
> 
>  
> 
> Greg Sestero and Tom Bissell, “ _The Disaster Artist, My Life Inside_ The Room”

I standing on roof.

It is nighttime, middle of dark night, and here I am. How I get here? Why? These are not first questions a man ask in this time, instead, it is, why in hell is Mercedes on roof?

Mercedes is there, next to me, bright headlight flashing in my eyes and naked body (yes I am naked but this is dream so not illegal don't sue me) and the light so blinding me that I move out of it and see that the headlight is shooting far across whole city and shining on lighthouse of Alcatraz.

“Why you doing this, Mercedes?” I ask car, and moving to see inside. It is all darkness and I am fear. I stepping closer and again ask, “What do you want from me, car?” Then horn honking and scare me like shit. It keep honking and honking, over and over until sound changes – it is only alarm clock, telling me it is 8:28 and time for me to get out of bed for day at bank.

I groaning, reach down and stop alarm. It is hiding under Lisa’s sexy red dress. I wish I can hide inside dress, too, but I have to be the man and go to make the money. Lisa try to help, but the computer business is too competitive and she is only woman.

After I shower and kiss Lisa goodbye, I walk out to Mercedes and laugh. “Car on roof, haha! Car cannot fly, my brain is so crazy!”

 

At bank, Old Man Donkey gives me the news – the company is having a big Promotion Meeting tomorrow.

“Better be ready, Little Boy Johnny,” Old Man Donkey tells me. “Tomorrow is your big day. If you screw it up, then no promotion for you!” He is very disrespectful.

That night, I tell Lisa about the big meeting. She is very happy, and gives me big kiss. I tell her I want to go to sleep early, so I can have my good rest for important day tomorrow. I go upstairs and yawn while making naked, so good to get beneath covers that I can hear myself snore like dinosaur. A light gets big behind my eyelids, and I am on the roof again. The light split into two lights and my stomach split with hunger. I more hungry than I feel in my anything, it never feel this, like I want to drink a lake and eat a cat or something, like crazy. I see now two lights are from Mercedes and this time I don't ask what in hell car doing on roof I just want to get out of there. 

I jump in Mercedes and we zoom away like magic. I can't even put on seat belt. We are flying over San Francisco like airplane. Higher and higher we go, city getting small like for doll or ant. Then it get dark, we are over the bay and car come swooping down.

“Alcatraz!” I scream when I see lighthouse. “Car, why you take me to jail!”

Car lands softly (because it is Mercedes) and I get out, all dizzy feeling from wild ride. I fall on my face, and hunger is there again. Someone grab me and bring me to my feet and I see it is daytime, and Alcatraz is full of people moving around. Two guards dragging me so my feet cannot catch up, and I screaming. This is nightmare, I realize. 

They pull me up stairs and down long hallway and throw me in dark cell. I lay on cold dirty ground moaning because my stomach still hurting. When I sit up, I realizing someone else is there with me. 

“Who is that? Who are you, person? Show yourself!”

When man walk out of shadow, I am shocked. “Denny! What you doing here?”

Denny walk slow toward me swinging hip like bad boy and lean elbow against bed. He have toothpick hanging out of his mouth. “Who the hell is Denny?”

“Denny, don't play games. We in big trouble here. Help me yell for guards tell them they have confusion and let us out.”

“The only one here who seems to be confused is you, bub,” Denny say, then grab my ass.

“Denny, are you on drugs? Why you act crazy? What is this 'bub' stuff?”

Denny laugh and then my stomach ache again so hard I fall to the floor. Denny stand over me and say, “Poor bastard. Going through the shakes and don't even know why. Here, let me help you, son.”

Denny bend over and take me in his arms. He is so strong, my God. Maybe he doing workout? He hold me close and I can smell him, so good like cookies baking in oven. My mind stop working and a bite him. His blood fill my mouth so delicious like honey and it feels so good, no more stomachache. Suddenly I realize what I doing and and let go, I feel sharp teeth in my mouth and scream, “Denny what is happening! What I do to your neck!”

Denny still laughing, like no big deal I bite his neck to shit. I see teeth in his mouth growing getting sharper and sharper and he pull my hair back and bite me so hard I scream like dying cat.

Suddenly I am back in apartment, all covered in sweat but safe in my bed. Lisa is yelling at me, saying that I should stop screaming and go take a shower. I do what she tell me, and under the water I remembering the taste of Denny's blood in my mouth. 

That night, I stay awake until sun come up. I cannot sleep for the fear. Am I for fear of Denny or for myself? I don't know. Both, maybe.

 

I go to work like zombie next day. My eyes are red and blurry and I cannot think for shit. When Old Man Donkey walks by my office, I try to hide but he see me.

“Well, Little Boy Johnny, I hope you ready to impress the bosses with your money ideas! This is Promotion Day for all little boys!”

Promotion Meeting! I can't believe I forget about it. 

“I be there,” I say to Old Man Donkey, then try to remember my Promotion Speech. Is no good. My mind is blank and I start to sweat like crazy. I go to conference room, and before I say hello to the bosses, I have to run to bathroom because I vomit. 

Old Man Donkey walks in bathroom and sees me laying on floor. “Are you drunk, Little Boy Johnny? You must be because you vomiting. No promotion for you.” 

“No!” I crying, “I don't drink the vodka! I have bad dream!”

“Now you are lying, Little Boy Johnny. Be careful or I fire you.” 

I want to cry because I know Lisa and her mother will upset. How can I buy Lisa big house with no promotion?

After work, I go to flower shop. I buy Lisa flowers every week because she is princess. Also I know she be angry for messing up my promotion. Even with flowers, she still ask about promotion right when I come home. Instead of yelling at me, she very nice. Then she get me drunk. I don't like to drink, but for Lisa, I do anything. After all, she's my future wife.

I get so drunk that I cannot make love to Lisa. My head spinning and I pass out naked, hoping the vodka will keep me from dreaming. It does not. I am on roof again, naked, with headlights pointing at lighthouse. 

“All right, car,” I shout, “this time I in charge! We go right back to Alcatraz and tell Denny it's time to stop playing games and come home!”

I get in my car and steer it over city. I happy to be in control. We land at Alcatraz and I jump out, ready to look for Denny. As soon as I jump out of car, Mercedes fly off without me.

“Hey, stupid car! Why you leave me here?” I sigh, “Well, whatever.”

Just then a big cloud blocks the moon, and it moving really fast. “What's that?” I ask, then suddenly they flying all around me, tickling my butt and tangling my hair. They squealing and flapping like hell. 

“Get away from me, you bastards!” I yell, then screaming as I feel my feet come off the ground. “Let me go!”

We going higher and higher, and I am far above the city. They screeching and biting me, hundreds and thousands of them, and I know I die if they let me go. Finally they all fly away, and I spinning downwards, howling like a cat again as I fall closer and closer to the lighthouse...

“Would you shut up! Damn it, Johnny, what's wrong with you!” Lisa is in bed next to me, very angry. “Go get in the shower while I change the sheets. You've soaked the bed!”

I try to kiss her because I so happy to be alive and next to her, but she shove me away. “Don't touch me!” She wrinkle her nose. “You smell like old shoe. Get in shower now!”

 

The next night I afraid to fall asleep. I never dream of dying before and I don't want to dream again. When nighttime come, I drink lots of coffee and turn on the Zumba video. Lisa tells me I am a fool. This make me sad, but I cannot face the bats again.

It is three-thirty when I finish last Zumba workout, and I run out of coffee. I sit on the couch and fall asleep. 

I dream I flying again, holding hand of Denny, who is so beautiful with lights of the city shining on his face. We flying like Peter Pan, so nice and I ask Denny if he having good time.

“We always have good time when we fly, Johnny. Don't you remember?”

“Haha, Denny,” I say, “you are crazy. We never fly in real life. This is only dream.”

Only dream?” Denny say, like a threat. I don't like his voice. “Is no dream, Johnny. This is real memory. If only dream, then you don't mind I let you go.”

Denny take his hand back and I falling, screaming. I wake up and Lisa throwing glass of water in my face.

 

Next day I so tired because I not sleeping good way. These dreams are killing me, my God. I take nap while Lisa go shopping, and I flying through city again with Denny. It tell him I kill him if he drop me again, and he laugh, telling me I'm crazy we have good time and then Denny start flying towards Alcatraz again. I remembering the bats and say I want to go home instead. Maybe we can play football. 

“But this is home, Johnny,” Denny say softly. “Don't you remember?”

“Remember like shit!” I say, “I don't live in jail!”

Denny shake his head, and then I hear someone screaming, “Give me my fucking money!” from inside jail.

“Who in hell is that?” I ask.

“Johnny, you must help me,” Denny says. “You must wake up now!”

I open my eyes and I am in bed, but I still hear screaming. It coming from roof. Then I hear Denny crying.

I run up to roof just in time to save Denny from drug dealer. Mark, my best friend, is there, too. He must have heard screaming. We take drug dealer to stop-and-go police headquarters on the corner and are back in time to yell at Denny for his mistake.

“You know better, _roight?!_ ” I shout at him.

“I just wanted to pay off some stuff!” he whine, and I want to tell him he is idiot but instead I press his head to my heart so he can feel the fatherly love.

 

That night I not afraid to fall asleep. Now I think dreams are good, because they show me why Denny can go to jail and they tell me when to save him. I still don't like when he grab my ass, but maybe that only dream accident. You know, it can happen!

Lisa tell me she want to make love, but I tell her no, I need sleep. She upset, but I must speak to Dream Denny about his drug problem. 

Soon I am on roof but this time I have the thirsty hunger again. “No,” I say, “not this, I have to help Denny.”

I fly Mercedes to Alcatraz and I don't fight when guards take me to jail. I am good at dream now, I play like video game!

When the guards throw me in Denny's cell, I stand up and “Denny, no more games. Come out here and talk to me.”

He walk out of shadows with toothpick in his mouth again. “Who the hell is Denny?”

“I said no more games!” I am father figure, so I put my hands on hips. It is correct body language. “You have drug problem, that is why you are in -”

Suddenly I have bad cramp and bend over like going to vomit.

“That's rich,” Denny say, spitting out toothpick, “callin' me a junky meanwhile you're jonesin' so bad you can't stand up straight.”

“Denny! What's wrong with me!” I wail, and coughing, “And why you talk so weird like that?”

“You got the blood Dts, poor bastard. Only one thing for it.”

Denny carry me to his bed. Again I notice that he very strong. I guess people so bored in jail they just work out all the time.

“Here,” Denny say, then he stab his own neck open with fingernail and blood gushing out.

“Ahh!” I scream, “Denny what you doing!”

I saying this, but the blood is on my lips and it is so warm and delicious, like best thing I ever taste in my life. I drinking from Denny's neck, even though I thinking how bad this is. I cannot help it, I don't control myself, I am under spell. I drinking and crying at the same time. 

Eventually I am full, like after Thanksgiving. I feel drunk and I fall asleep. For first time in whole week, I sleep so good.

 

Lisa wake me up next morning and tell her that she is mad at me because I hit her. That is bullshit. I get dressed so I can go up to roof and have place to think.

When I open roof door, I see Mark, my best friend, he is there. We talk for a while but he acting funny, like he have secret or something. We are best friends, we should not have secrets from each other, I tell him. He get angry and walk away. 

When Denny come to roof, I very happy to see him. I don't think about crazy dreams because I am happy that he doesn't keep secrets from me. He is very sexual and think about kissing women so much. That is good for his age. Maybe this is why he grab my ass. I guess it is not big deal.

Still, he worry too much. He ask about movie before we even at theater. I tell him not to think too much, or it may not come out right. I am good father. He need to be more seat-of-the-pants.

After movie I come home and go to bed. Now I thinking that dreams are trying to tell me how to help Denny with his sexual thoughts and his drug problem. It is hard being father because teenagers are so complicated. Psychology help me understand the dreams of my challenge.

When I find myself on roof, I am not afraid to be naked. It is symbol of my purity. The bats come and I know they represent my relationship to the planet. They lift me into air and take me down to window of my apartment. Instead of me sleeping in my bed, I see Lisa there with Mark, and they are sexing. I cannot believe it.

“No, stupid bats!” I scream, “It is lie!”

Mark's butt is naked, and I don't want to watch him doing sex to my future wife. Still, I cannot look away. Suddenly I see something swirling out of his butt, getting bigger like wart. Bigger and bigger it getting, and it starts to look like a head with a mouth that opening to talk.

“Ahh! What is it! Bats! Get me out of here! This is monster!”

Mark is still sexing Lisa like he does not know that his butt is growing huge man out of it. The mouth is gurgling and I can see eyeball and nose appear. I realize it is Denny, and he is trying to say something.

“Denny, speak!” I say, because I know that he must have important thing to tell me if he have to use Mark's butt.

He groan and finally say, “You must... find yourself... great... Kiiiiiiiiing!”

 

The next day I very careful with Lisa. I know she cheating on me with Mark because of dream. When I come home from bank, she in living room with Michelle. They think they have secret, but I already know what they talk about. Michelle leave, and Lisa have this attitude. She is drunk. I remind her that I am her future husband, and she should tell me everything, but she still have attitude. She make me so angry that I push her. I should not have done that, but her lying make me crazy. After that, she say she have to take a bath and go to bed. I mad, but I still love her. I tell her that.

While Lisa in bath, I cry. Then I fall asleep. I dream that I am flying over San Francisco all alone. No Denny, no bat friends. The city is dark and there are no people anywhere. It is just me. So lonely.

The next day I decide to to play some football to cheer me up. I tell Lisa I will be out late, and she say that she going shopping with her mother. I go down to alley and Mike is there. He tells me about his underwear tragedy. It is very funny, he is such crazy guy. Eventually Greg and Denny show up and we have good time, just guys being guys, throwing football around and talking about life. I love my friends so much, even Mark, who is doing sex with my future wife. 

Then, Mike have accident and sprain his ankle. Football can be dangerous, that's life. I go home early and Lisa not know that I am sitting in the dark when she come home with her mother. There is nothing weird about this and I did not plan it at all. I hear her tell her mother she is doing sex with another man. I know it is Mark. This is when I decide to record everything.

 

On the roof, light rain falls on my naked body. Denny is in the passenger seat of my Mercedes, waiting for me. I get in driver seat and car lifts into sky as I lean over to kiss him. He is so sexual, he is not little boy anymore, but man. He bite my lip and blood mix in our mouth, this is the very adult kiss, maybe kinky a little bit. 

“I don't feel bad for this because Lisa betray me,” I tell Denny.

“No,” Denny say, “it you who betrayed us.”

“Us?” I asking.

“The people who love you,” Denny say. A tear roll down his cheek.

“What you talk about?” I ask. 

“You will,” Denny say, wiping tear away. “For now, take us home.”

I cannot say why, but I know he mean Alcatraz.

 

Peter come over to my house next day to play psychologist. Is more fun when Mark comes over. I tell the story of how I meet Lisa, and he talk about new girlfriend, say she is married and that relationship is so complicated, but I know he mean Lisa. Is all just kid stuff, and I starting to think that the dream reality is is realer than the real reality. That is my opinion, anyway.

 

I am walking in downtown San Francisco and yes, I am naked. But there is no one around so does not matter. I see restaurant where I first meet Lisa. She is there, drinking her coffee. And there is me, dressed like busboy, saying hi to her.

Suddenly Denny is next to me. He is naked too. “YMCA and a two thousand dollar check, huh?” He look at me. “But what about before that? Ever wonder who you were before Lisa?”

I realize that I never ask myself this. I always figure that my life began when I met Lisa. 

Denny turn to me, angry. “I entrusted my people to you, and you betrayed us!” Denny pushes me and I fall on my bare ass. “All for her! That _bitch_!”

 

Wedding photo day was very sunshine. I wait downstairs for Denny, Peter, and Mark. Mark shave his face and now he look like little babyface. He probably do for Lisa. Denny want to play football before photographer show up but Chicken Peter start to whine. He fall and rip hole in pants. What can I say? Football is dangerous, but that's life.

 

Again I am downtown, and yes I am naked, okay? Stop asking. Doesn't matter because I am invisible. There are so many people around but none of them can see me. I see myself in group of young people. I am so handsome and I look very happy, you know, like they say I smiling ear to ear. My friends all watch me and I am the leader of the gang. There are some young girls across the street and they watch me, they can see that I have very sexual energy, and they want to talk to me. I look at them and they come over. It is all arranged just with my eyes, I have that power. I see myself, my friends and the girls disappear. Was this my life before Lisa? Denny is not here to ask.

 

Mark wants to meet me for lunch at cafe. Maybe he feel guilty little bit? 

He try to ask me about my job, like maybe he want to steal that from me, too. I don't think Mark is my best friend anymore. Maybe he is evil, I don't know. 

 

I walking around Alcatraz just exploring, but for strange reason I feel like I know every little part of this place. Bat friends come and take me on adventure, and I know that if I relax they don't tickle my ass so much. Is actually very fun. 

We fly over city again, but this time going very fast. There is big whirlpool in the sky. 

“What in hell is that?”

Bat friends don't answer me, instead they crashing me through whirlpool and my whole body electrocuted. San Francisco look different now.

“Where the hell are you taking me, bats?” They never say shit to me. Why do I ask them? 

We fly above Tenderloin district and they take me to window of apartment building. Inside, people have sexy time like big orgy. 

“Whoa,” I laugh, then I notice that everyone covered in blood and me and Denny are in the middle of room. 

Suddenly Young Me stand up and spread his arms wide. He start laughing and the lightning strike. “It is me, King Johnny of Alcatraz! I feed again!” Then all the vampires in the room fall to knees to worship him. 

“Pretty cool,” I tell bat friends.

 

Friday is my birthday and Lisa spend all day planning my surprise party. She not very smart. Why else would furniture be pushed in corner and so many chips in kitchen? Before I go to work, she say she pregnant. I tell her maybe we name the baby Mark.

 

“I'm leaving you, Johnny,” Lisa say and take her bag and walk out of my life.

I can't believe it, even though I knew this happen someday. Lisa is my whole life. I go to bank everyday just so I can buy her things to please her. What now? 

I look around house and everything is trash, all just for Lisa who is down the hall doing sex on Mark. I smash everything and throw stupid TV out window. Then I go upstairs and find Lisa's sexy red dress...

 

After that I'm ready to end everything. I pick up gun I get from Denny's drug dealer and...

“Stop!”

It's Denny.

“How you get in here!” I cry. It doesn't matter. “Go away, Denny I want to be alone!”

“No,” Denny say, “you have never been alone. I was always here with you.” He take gun out of my hand. “It is time I tell you everything, Johnny. You,” Denny say, “are King of the Vampires.”

I cannot believe my ear. “What?”

“Is true. You came to San Francisco in twenties as poor little Polish boy. After few months in the gigolo business they throw you in jail. That's where we met. I was King of the Vampires then, but when I meet you, I know you had right stuff. I was doing gig for few thousands of years and wanted to take some time off, see Greece, Rome, you know, so I pass crown to you. Vampires flourished under your rule, you fight for vampire rights, organize rallies and feed-ins, and vampires become more accepted then any other time in history. I was so impressed, I decide to just stay out of the way. For eighty years you reigned over vampires, until the day you see Lisa. You gave it all up for love. In the end, a handful of followers hunted me down and ask that I bring you to your senses, so I disguise myself as your faithful manchild, watching over you until I see the evil ways of your human companions. But I have failed, and their faithlessness has led you to suicide!”

“No, Denny, I don't kill myself. I done with this shit, let's go back to Alcatraz.”

“You mean it!”

“Of course! This human stuff is bullshit, haha!”

“Great! But first,” Denny say, twinkling his eye, “do you want to toss the ball around?”

“Maybe we do that when we go home, our true home, Alcatraz!”

Then Denny and I run to roof, to see Mercedes waiting patiently for us. 

“To Alcatraz!” Denny scream, and we fly off into the sunset.


End file.
